For the last few days, the BlackOuts have become Relentless – Again… But what’s worse This Time is that The Dysphagia is coming back. Again.
It’s been a Long While since Constant Aspirating was a genuine Problem. Now it’s been happening Continuously. With the Major Issues surrounding the BlackOuts, it’s no wonder, I suppose, really – except it’s Not been a Problem like this for A Long Time.
Been SUCH BAD Blackout Cycles – basically taken ALL Meds to start kicking its ass… ALL Due To The DAMNED WEATHER.
The Weather has been a Big Instigator, as always, with these BlackOuts this time. June Weather has been BAD and the Air Pressure Isobars have been nothing but a RollerCoaster of Hell. This causes INSURMOUNABLE PAINFUL AGONY in and of itself… Which inevitably leads to these Nightmarish BlackOuts…
Just coming round again and again – EVERY DAY IS JUST ANOTHER DAY LOST TO BLACKOUS – PAIN SO BAD. So Bad, I Can’t Come Round even, cos of the Sheer AGONY I am in…… A few seconds 0of consciousness just spiranls into another BlackOut, the PAIN is THAT Intense & Agonising….
MAJOR pins and needles and no movement on left hand outside of it – its horrible … but at least it’s generally less since mam stated putting “red label” Tisserand oils [that would be: Muscle Ease Massage & Body Oil] on me.
BAD NIGHTMARES…. Hallucinations. ALL more Real than actual Reality.
Other times… Well.
It just goes from doing something normal one minute, to being aware of Just Black, in the next… And then struggling hard through that Black until you’re opening eyes to view the ceiling and the sheer AGONY of my squished and twisted spine, after falling dropping backwards and smacking hard aginst whatever happens to be behind me.
Was Bad Enough BEFORE. With Just The Weather & Isobars.
But Now….? Paying SEVERELY FOR GOING OUT TO TOWN. TO ONE SHOP. FOR TWO HOURS OUT. ON ONE DAY.
Paying for DAYS AND DAYS AND DAYS.
FOR. JUST. THIS. ONE. SMALL. THING.
Fibro FlareUps come with the most awful sympoms to go with the AGIONISING PAIN and Nauseating Aches…
My ears are stuffed, in echoey, tinlging or burning pain… They discharge water-like fluid, or it dries up inside becoing sand-like crusted and Hurting Badly inside my ears.
My eyes really cant see properly, can’t focus … Like they’re like in a haze, and grainy, with a veil drawn over them like what around me isn’t real, but also with what I’m looking at even moving – floating-ish, or standing out like a Pop Filter in photo editing, and/or even shimmering like a Bad heatwave. They’re also burning & twitching, or refusing to even open up properly at all.
It’s always a Nightmare trying to sort out Meds in this state – can barely move AT ALL – and whem I try it is AGONISING & SUPER REALLY HARD – and then it takes over half an hour to manage in the end….. That’s from start to finish. OF TAKING MEDS – as in here’s the meds, out meds in mouth, swallow meds. Five Times Per Day – Evey Single Day.
It’s an ABYSMAL reality and a Precarious Mountain to climb.
To. Just.Take. Meds.
Never Mind Anything Else
Wednesday Night/Thusday Morning 12/06/2024 – 13/06/2024
With Buddy still in my side of the bed, I got in wrapped around him around 6am – after being Up ALL NIGHT – and we snuggled until meds time, now…. Where I ended up aspirating Pudding again and managed to retch it up on my own…
The Tendon is bitching in the Right side and causing pain, too, cos of my positioning in the bed. Somehow pulled or bunched muscled in the neck and set the damned thing off.
THURSDAY NIGHT /FRIDAY MORNING – 13/06/2024 -14/06/2024
04:44am – So Night before was a LONG drawn out night. Including Lollies Meds Night…. And Now I am settling to looking at a tablet with a BLT sandwich from Tesco… Only “real” food I had all day… or the closest thing to it anyway…
This Afternoon I Actually Aspirated a sodding CAT’S CLAW CApsule – yeh, a Gods-Damned CAT’s CLAW . I’ve never done THAT before. It’s always been the smaller ones, like Baclofen… Like I did this morning.
I aspirated a damned Baclofen during This Morning’s Meds, as well… FFS….(!!!!????!!!???!)
Had FIVE seperate BlackOut Cycles until about 6:45pm, by which time the 2nd Pregabalin must have started kciking in. I managed to take my Zomorph at that time then, without too much fuss after that, and didn’t aspirate anything.
My head is hurting SO DAMNED MUCH now…. All that coughing, effort, retching, struggling for breath…
Mam had to Bang My Back again, and HARD This Time. Haven’t had to do that in a few weeks, maybe months, because if it’s happened, I’ve managed to retch it up myself somehow. Including This Morning’s One.
This is all starting to Gather Steam Again… Dysphagia was sort-of doing OK.
This is NOT Good.
Is It The Weather? Stress?? Haven’t sodding slept, or even rested in bed, for a while. Sure as hell haven’t been able to rest out of bed.
Everything has been a CHAOTOC PALAVER these last couple of weeks or so.
Then the weather decided to go Stupid MEGA RollerCoster Isobars on us, as well…
