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๐Ÿ’œ๐Ÿ’… With All The Love & Care That There Can Be… ๐Ÿ’๐Ÿ’œ

Catheter Chaos โ€ข Boots Discrimination Discomfort…

Temp | 11ยฐC

The Catheter just came out again…

It lasted only 6 Days, this time… ๐Ÿ˜ณ๐Ÿ˜”โ˜น๏ธ

Itโ€™s so annoying, having to undo all the straps and sort through all the tubing, and whatnots, when disposing of a shoved-out Catheter.

Then thereโ€™s the Dragon of Disappointment, and all the other damn โ€œemotionsโ€ and crushing, suffocating โ€œfeelsโ€ that go with it.

Certainly makes me more determined to get a good meeting out of the Suprapubic Pre-Op Hospital Appt. next week

Catheter tubing, leg bag & Night Bag
The Reality of the Indwelling Catheter

I really feel… horrible… Betrayed, almost, by the damned thing. Strange, but true!I thought I could at least make it through another month, but apparently not. My stomach is all knotted… I feel something… crushing, twisting, fiery, scratchy, bitter… upset…๐Ÿ˜ข

I am not in the right space for this to happen along with everything else… ๐Ÿ˜–๐Ÿ˜–๐Ÿ˜–

I was miserable enough without this…

Itโ€™s been spasming all day. No doubt due to all the stress Iโ€™ve been under. Or… maybe more like I put me under… ๐Ÿคจ๐Ÿค”… ๐Ÿ˜’๐Ÿ˜’๐Ÿ˜’

Between fearing the arduous and overwhelmed task of flipping the mattress, and the issues Iโ€™m having, now Iโ€™m arguing with Boots about whether or not people in wheelchairs should be treated better than naughty puppies, Iโ€™ve been in a lot of depressive misery today.

Boots made me feelย small, pointless, miserable, undignified, insulted, belittled…ย Vulnerable… Iโ€™ve been in scared and sorrowful misery all day.

But then I got some balls and got going with sorting out the mattress, because there was No Way I was sounding another night like I had been, in that much pain. Iโ€™d had enough painful nights and nightmares, and last night was the final straw.

But I guess it was too little, too late, and the stress of all of it was too much…?

Either way… The bastard thing is out again. ๐Ÿ˜’๐Ÿ˜’๐Ÿ˜’๐Ÿ˜’๐Ÿ˜’๐Ÿ˜’

Catheter tubing & Night Bag
This is what it should be doing… As opposed to shoving itself out of me…๐Ÿคจ๐Ÿ˜’

#upset #frustration #fatigue #exhaustion #fibroplegia #dragondisappointment #irritated #sad #pain #dignity #suffocatingfeels #catheter #fibromyalgia #anxiety #aspie #healthcare #alexithymia #stressed #dismal #depression #resentment #helplessness #disabilityPowered by Journey Diary.