Tag: Pain

Fibro Bunny

Posted on by delphinemusic in anxiety, autistic, blackouts, CFS/ME, chronic illness, Chronic Pain, Chronic Paraesthesia, crushingfeels, despairing, disability, disassociation, distressed, exasperation, exhaustion, fatigue, Fibromyalgia, Fibroplegia, frustration, healthcare, helplessness, Illness & Depression, imprisonedfeels, inhell, Isobars / Air-Pressure, long COVID, Mental Health, mentalhealth, miserable, numbness, onedge, overwhelmed, pain, PTSD, ptsd, sad, Stamina & Energy, stress, stressed, suffocatingfeels, uncertainty, uncomfortable, upset, vibratingscared, weather, Weather/Isobars

This... SUPER DRAINED EXHAUSTION is Getting Seriously, Severely Out Of Hand. There's the Paresthesia Nightmare of PAIN. The Undiagnosed Long COVID that's making it impossible to even move. ... Seriously, I Just Don't Know how else to word this DEEP ... Empty & VOID inside of... Ability To Move Or Even Breathe without The Most Enormous Effort... Wasn't there before I got COVID and now it's just getting worse with each day and month that goes by...

Enduring The Days… The Relentless, Endless Days

Posted on by delphinemusic in aggitated, Agony, badday, badthings, badweather, blackouts, chronic illness, Chronic Pain, Chronic Paraesthesia, despairing, disability, disaster, dismal, distressed, drained, exhaustion, fatigue, Fibromyalgia, Fibroplegia, Illness & Depression, pain, painsomnia, weather, Weather/Isobars

Unable to eat, my Fibro FlareUp is SUPERNOVA… Enough that I keep Blacking Out from the PAIN… AFTER A HORRIBLE, TORTUOUS NIGHT & MORNING OF PANIC ATTACKS….. I now find out the Lead on my charging box by bed has failed. The USB plus directly in the baby plug TOWER isn’t working. Can’t get at … Continue reading Enduring The Days… The Relentless, Endless Days →

Running Through Custard & Quicksand

Posted on by delphinemusic in aggitated, anxiety, ASD, asd, autistic, badweather, blackouts, chronic illness, Chronic Pain, Chronic Paraesthesia, drained, exhaustion, fatigue, Fibromyalgia, Fibroplegia, headache, healthcare, helplessness, hypervigilance, imprisonedfeels, infection, Isobars / Air-Pressure, Mental Health, miserable, morphine, nausea, numbness, overwhelmed, pain, painsomnia, Ramblings, spasms, stress, Treatments, weather, Weather/Isobars

I'm absolutely WRECKED... Feeling like I've been hit by a runaway BULLET Train, run over by a tank, then forcibly wrapped inside a boa-constrictor that has SEVERELY ELECTROCUTING giant hedgehog spikes, IMPALING Me EVERYWHERE, with NON-STOP Electrocuting Currents.... And With Each Individual Cell having its very OWN TENS Machine Attached -- on "MEGA SUPERNOVA...(!!!!!!)" Power...

Just…. WRECKED…

Posted on by delphinemusic in autistic, badday, badthings, badweather, catheter, chaos, chronic illness, Chronic Pain, Chronic Paraesthesia, confused, crushingfeels, despairing, disability, disaster, dismal, distressed, drained, exasperation, exhaustion, fatigue, Fibromyalgia, Fibroplegia, frustration, healthcare, helplessness, Mental Health, mentalhealth, miserable, onedge, pain, painsomnia, Stamina & Energy, stress, stressed, suprapubic catheter, upset

It's Nearly 4:30pm... and only NOW do I feel like I'm even STARTING to feel like MAYBE I can manage to do something. Like, Get Out Of Bed. Try to Play a Game. I wanted to get up by 12-to-1pm -ish to try and play the end bit of Mass Effect 1 [Legendary] for the … Continue reading Just…. WRECKED… →

The Nightmare of Nightmares, Hemiplegia & Grinding Teeth

Posted on by delphinemusic in aggitated, Agony, anguish, anxiety, ASD, asd, autistic, badthings, badweather, chaos, chronic illness, Chronic Pain, Chronic Paraesthesia, concerned, confused, crushingfeels, disability, dismal, distressed, disturbed, drained, drowningfeels, exhaustion, fatigue, Fibromyalgia, Fibroplegia, headache, healthcare, helplessness, Hemiplegia Attack, Hemiplegic Migraine, Illness & Depression, imprisonedfeels, Isobars / Air-Pressure, mobility problems, morphine, overwhelmed, pain, painkillers, painsomnia, Ramblings, sensoryoverload, spasms, stress, stressed, tmi, uncomfortable, upset, weather, Weather/Isobars

[So] after Suffering Awful Nightmares through the night, I've then been Grinding my Teeth SO HARD, meaning that now -- the Right Side of my Jaw is ABSOLUTLY KILLING ME... I think it's entirely DISTRUPTED the Neuropathy in there -- So It UTTERLY, OVERWHELMINGLY, DEVESTATINGLY HURTS It's AGONY... ... I'm also starting to Get Concerned & wonder if those Nerves are being DAMAGED IRREPRABLY from it happening REALLY FREQUENTLY again...  I was SO Exhausted last night, I Wiped OUT at 12:30am -- This was after Three Days Straight of Zero Sleep Throughout The Entire Night. That's what you get when Weird-Ass Weather, Stress & High Anxiety (especially the weather at this point) comes & Kicks You All The Way Down The Huge Mountain of Horrible You Are On... Otherwise Known As A Fibro-FlareUp & The Consequences Thereof.

Clues About Myself – I Don’t SEE Me(?!)

Posted on by delphinemusic in Alexithymia, ASD, autistic, Chronic Pain, Chronic Paraesthesia, confused, CPTSD, dignity, disability, disassociation, Fibromyalgia, Fibroplegia, healthcare, Hemiplegic Migraine, independence, Mental Health, PTSD, ptsd, selfawareness, selfcare, stress, trauma, trauma

I am doing something so Stupidly Mundane... But as I am doing it, it's bringing into focus something that's been a... Thing... for a Long Time for me -- but didn't actually clock-on that it WAS a Thing... Until Now. All I am doing is writing up the stupid "About You" section of a website. That's it. And that's making me realise I know Absolutely Jack Sh*t About Myself -- Subjectively, Objectively, Consciously, Subconsciously...

I WISH.com They Would Make It EASY!!

Posted on by delphinemusic in aggitated, Alexithymia, anxiety, ASD, Asperger, autistic, badday, badthings, badweather, blackouts, chronic illness, Chronic Pain, dismal, distressed, dragondisappointment, drowningfeels, exasperation, exhaustion, fatigue, feelsick, Fibromyalgia, frustration, Illness & Depression, pain, Ramblings

Their Returns System is Horribly Convoluted, Senseless, Difficult. I am MEGA Fatigued after gruelling WEEKS of BAD Fibro-FlareUp... I have PAIN, Brain / Fibro Fog & a Head full of Cotton Balls... I am actually Blacking Out from the Exhaustion & Pain I ALREADY HAVE... and NOW I have to... Manage. This. ....?? Fibromyalgia Cares NOT for Stupid & Ridiculous RETURNS Systems...!! And. YET.....

Black Heart Dying

Posted on by delphinemusic in aggitated, Alexithymia, angry, anguish, anxiety, autistic, badday, badthings, chronic illness, Chronic Pain, Chronic Paraesthesia, concerned, confused, CPTSD, crushingfeels, despairing, devestated, disability, disassociation, dismal, distressed, disturbed, dragondisappointment, drained, drowningfeels, exhaustion, fatigue, feelsick, Fibromyalgia, frustration, furious, grief, headache, helplessness, hypervigilance, Illness & Depression, imprisonedfeels, inhell, Isolation, lost, Mental Health, mentalhealth, miserable, numbness, overwhelmed, panic, PTSD, ptsd, Resentment, scared, sensoryoverload, Stamina & Energy, stress, stressed, suffocatingfeels, terrified, trauma, trauma, uncertainty, upset, vibratingscared, waitingfordoom

Screaming alone inside my head Grasping desperation till I'm dead Black fingers pouring threads of war From wounds that I can no longer ignore