Temp | 11°C
The Catheter just came out again…
It lasted only 6 Days, this time… 😳😔☹️
It’s so annoying, having to undo all the straps and sort through all the tubing, and whatnots, when disposing of a shoved-out Catheter.
Then there’s the Dragon of Disappointment, and all the other damn “emotions” and crushing, suffocating “feels” that go with it.
… Certainly makes me more determined to get a good meeting out of the Suprapubic Pre-Op Hospital Appt. next week…
I really feel… horrible… Betrayed, almost, by the damned thing. Strange, but true!I thought I could at least make it through another month, but apparently not. My stomach is all knotted… I feel something… crushing, twisting, fiery, scratchy, bitter… upset…😢
I am not in the right space for this to happen along with everything else… 😖😖😖
I was miserable enough without this…
It’s been spasming all day. No doubt due to all the stress I’ve been under. Or… maybe more like I put me under… 🤨🤔… 😒😒😒
Between fearing the arduous and overwhelmed task of flipping the mattress, and the issues I’m having, now I’m arguing with Boots about whether or not people in wheelchairs should be treated better than naughty puppies, I’ve been in a lot of depressive misery today.
Boots made me feel small, pointless, miserable, undignified, insulted, belittled… Vulnerable… I’ve been in scared and sorrowful misery all day.
But then I got some balls and got going with sorting out the mattress, because there was No Way I was sounding another night like I had been, in that much pain. I’d had enough painful nights and nightmares, and last night was the final straw.
But I guess it was too little, too late, and the stress of all of it was too much…?
Either way… The bastard thing is out again. 😒😒😒😒😒😒
#upset #frustration #fatigue #exhaustion #fibroplegia #dragondisappointment #irritated #sad #pain #dignity #suffocatingfeels #catheter #fibromyalgia #anxiety #aspie #healthcare #alexithymia #stressed #dismal #depression #resentment #helplessness #disabilityPowered by Journey Diary.