Tag: catheter

On a Day Like Today… Or Any Other…

Posted on by delphinemusic in aggitated, Agony, Alexithymia, angry, anguish, anxiety, ASD, asd, autistic, bpd, catheter, chaos, chronic illness, Chronic Pain, Chronic Paraesthesia, concerned, confused, CPTSD, crushingfeels, despairing, devestated, dignity, disability, disassociation, dismal, distressed, districtnurses, disturbed, dragondisappointment, drained, drowningfeels, exasperation, exhaustion, fatigue, feelsick, Fibromyalgia, frustration, furious, headache, helplessness, Illness & Depression, independence, Stamina & Energy, suprapubic catheter

Fibromyalgia... Is a world where you’ve been making lots of plans on what you're Gona do today, tomorrow, next week.... THEN. You Move. (The Audacity!!) And probably Black out from the PAIN. With or without Screaming Sound-Effects; such is the Joy of Choice with Fibromyalgia...  (HA!... Not.)

Incontinence Interference

Posted on by delphinemusic in aggitated, anguish, anxiety, badthings, catheter, chronic illness, Chronic Pain, Chronic Paraesthesia, concerned, confused, CPTSD, despairing, devestated, Diagnostics, disability, dismal, distressed, disturbed, fatigue, feelsick, Fibromyalgia, Fibroplegia, frustration, grief, healthcare, helplessness, Hemiplegic Migraine, Illness & Depression, imprisonedfeels, independence, Mental Health, mentalhealth, miserable, mixedfeels, numbness, overwhelmed, personalinsights, PTSD, ptsd, Resentment, sad, scared, selfawareness, spasms, stress, stressed, suffocatingfeels, suprapubic catheter, terrified, trauma, trauma, Treatments, uncertainty, uncomfortable, upset, vibratingscared

Being Incontinent... Is Not An Easy Thing To Deal With. You Certainly Do Not Expect To Need Anything Before You're Even 40.... I mean — Basically, from the day you’re Successfully potty-trained in infancy, you definitely do NOT expect to be Back in Nappies by the time you're... 35.

Catheter’s Curse Forced To Continue…

Posted on by delphinemusic in Agony, Alexithymia, angry, anguish, anxiety, badday, badthings, bowel, catheter, chronic illness, Chronic Pain, crushingfeels, despairing, devestated, disassociation, dismal, distressed, disturbed, drained, exasperation, exhaustion, fatigue, Fibromyalgia, Fibroplegia, frustration, furious, helplessness, imprisonedfeels, lost, Mental Health, overwhelmed, Ramblings, Resentment, sad, sara, scared, selfawareness, selfcare, sensoryoverload, stress, suprapubic catheter

For more than Two Years I have endured my Catheter’s Torment... And I came So Damned Close to escaping it this week... Instead, I get to endure its strange ways for even longer now. There has been nothing but Blinding, Brain-Exploding, White-Hot, Agonising Pain for Days... I have had no sleep for three nights straight … Continue reading Catheter’s Curse Forced To Continue… →

First Consequences of Cancelled Surgery…

Posted on by delphinemusic in aggitated, Agony, anxiety, ASD, Asperger, badthings, catheter, despairing, devestated, distressed, dragondisappointment, drowningfeels, frustration, furious, painsomnia, Resentment, spasms, stressed, suprapubic catheter

... And this is only the beginning of them... I’m SO exhausted and in So Much Fucking Pain, that I am Severely Blacking Out again — as I have been all day...  I am looking at having to suffer through a Third Sleepless Night In A Row... And I just can’t get my head around it. This … Continue reading First Consequences of Cancelled Surgery… →

My (Nightmare) Catheter and I…

Posted on by delphinemusic in aggitated, Agony, Alexithymia, angry, anguish, anxiety, ASD, Asperger, catheter, concerned, crushingfeels, despairing, devestated, disability, disaster, distressed, disturbed, dragondisappointment, drained, drowningfeels, exasperation, exhaustion, fatigue, feelsick, Fibromyalgia, Fibroplegia, frustration, furious, grief, healthcare, helplessness, imprisonedfeels, infection, lost, Mental Health, mentalhealth, numbness, overwhelmed, panic, Resentment, sad, scared, stressed, suffocatingfeels, suprapubic catheter, terrified, trauma, uncertainty, upset, vibratingscared

... Throwback Thought... Today, I got a call from Urology stating that the Suprapubic Surgery I have been waiting Two Years For has been Cancelled — Four Days Before it was due (20th March 2020). Due To The Coronavirus Pandemonium. This was after waiting One Year to see the consultant — on 14th February 2019 — then having to be forced through THREE Pre-Operative Appointments (the first being in May 2019) and a … Continue reading My (Nightmare) Catheter and I… →

A Futile Fibro Flare-Up Day…

Posted on by delphinemusic in Alexithymia, anxiety, ASD, Asperger, aspie, catheter, chronic illness, Chronic Pain, Chronic Paraesthesia, despairing, disability, dismal, dragondisappointment, exasperation, exhaustion, fatigue, Fibromyalgia, Fibroplegia, frustration, Gaming, healthcare, helplessness, Illness & Depression, Isobars / Air-Pressure, lost, Mental Health, miserable, pain, sad, Skyrim, stress, weather

I’m in no shape of, or for, anything. Done naught but a few words in Daylio and Jouney Journal, then blindly and mindlessly poking around the internet a little... It’s horrible outside. Cold, rainy, high Humidity. The isobars are decent-ish at 1016mb. I’m so cold... But I can’t move, and in too much pain to do anything about it...

Catheter Chaos • Boots Discrimination Discomfort…

Posted on by delphinemusic in Alexithymia, anxiety, aspie, catheter, Chronic Pain, dignity, disability, dismal, dragondisappointment, exhaustion, fatigue, Fibromyalgia, Fibroplegia, frustration, healthcare, helplessness, irritated, Resentment, sad, stressed, suffocatingfeels, upset

Temp | 11°C The Catheter just came out again... It lasted only 6 Days, this time... 😳😔☹️ It’s so annoying, having to undo all the straps and sort through all the tubing, and whatnots, when disposing of a shoved-out Catheter. Then there’s the Dragon of Disappointment, and all the other damn “emotions” and crushing, suffocating “feels” that … Continue reading Catheter Chaos • Boots Discrimination Discomfort… →

Life In The Doo-Doo Lane…

Posted on by delphinemusic in ASD, Asperger, disability, Fibromyalgia, Illness & Depression, Ramblings, stress

Sometimes.... Just... No. It’s 12.21pm — Sitting in Table Table, heavy nausea in my tummy, not enough food or coffee anywhere near me, miserable because it’s my own fault I’m here right now, and wishing I was still stuffed in my bed, either awake or asleep. ... Adulting is Hard...! All my fault because, apparently, … Continue reading Life In The Doo-Doo Lane… →